After 8 years of chasing my broom (who am I kidding? my brooms, my many, many brooms, which I keep buying and which keep disappearing), dust pan, and mop all over my house, today I finally pounded three nails into the back of my vacuum closet and hung the various and furtive implements up.
I also cleaned out said closet so that said vacuum can actually fit in it. No more half-empty gallons of paint and rumpled scout shirts or 8 gallon buckets of honey. Also, none of these:
I also knocked down quite a few cobwebs and cleaned out my junk cabinet by the fridge. You know the one.
I have this recurring nightmare wherein everything I’ve ever owned–from before the house fire when I was four until now–is knee deep, all over my house, and I’m supposed to pack for an extended, or possibly permanent leave of absence, for my entire family, in the space of about three minutes.
I have this dream at least once a week, sometimes more, and I’ve had it for as long as I can remember. It makes me a bit phobic about keeping things. When I get stressed, the garbage sacks always come out. And still, every time I go on a cleaning rampage, I am astonished… where does this stuff come from?
So after that bit of purging, of course, I went shopping.
It was necessary–and we aren’t keeping any of it here. Well… mostly. I did buy some work clothes. But that’s only because for the past two years I’ve worn the same three pair of slacks to work on an ingenious, rotating schedule. Now, every day of the week will have its own outfit.
The rest, my daughter is taking with her to Mexico City and I highly doubt much of it will come back in salvageable condition after 18 months of wear. We decided it would be best if all 8 skirts, 8 shirts, 2 sweaters, and two pair of shoes were interchangeable. Right?
Try to accomplish that shopping trip in Moses Lake.
I dare you.
Also, I dare you to not let your imagination run wild with all the terrible possibilities inherent in sending off your firstborn, gorgeous daughter to Mexico for 18 months. Yeah. There might be a LOT of cupboard and closet purging going on around here.