Post ATI

Me, walking out of job interview:

Wow. I think that went well. Really well. In fact, I think I rocked that interview. Even if I don’t get the job, it was a good experience. That was a great group of people, and we all talked the same language, and at the very least, I now know that I can hold my own and interact comfortably with a target group of colleagues/supervisors.

Me, an hour after the interview:

Hmm. I wonder if I should have said that.

Me, two hours After The Interview (ATI) and yes, at this point, it has its own acronym:

I definitely shouldn’t have said that. And that last question, I bet you anything that what they really wanted to know is if I was willing to… 

Me, three hours ATI:

I’m such an idiot. Why did I/didn’t I (fill in the blank with the screaming match between the me who said what I said, and the me who is retroactively trying to convince the actual me into saying something different.)

Me, four hours ATI:

Texting grovelling, panicky message to teacher friend: It’s a good thing if they have already called some of my references right? I mean, they wouldn’t have called if they weren’t serious, yes? Please. I can’t breathe. Lie to me, make me feel better. Anything.

Me, circa ATI — TPC (THE Phone Call):

Not someone you want to know.

Writing this post. Proofreading this post. Trying to remember to breathe while reading this post.

Me, proofreading this post, when the phone rings:

Throwing things madly, jumping over furniture, trying to locate a phone. It’s almost 8 o’clock at night, but it could still be the high school. It could happen. Diving over my bed to snatch it up before the answering machine clicks off.

Hello?

Holy Smokes! It’s the whoever-it-is-that-makes-The Call, and whose name I cannot for the life of me remember.

Because I GOT THE JOB!

I. Got. The. Job.

Me.

Job.

Holy. Smokes. I got the job. Sophomore and pre-AP English.

I’m even more terrified now.

BUT I GOT THE JOB!!!!!!!