If You Give a Kid A…

If you give a kid a nap mat, she will sleep on the floor next to it. Every time:

If you give a kid a bucket, she will wear it on her head:

If you give a kid a helmet, he’ll probably wear it, but not necessarily the way you envisioned he would:

If you lie on your back and give the infant in your arms enough altitude, she will vomit:

If you give a group of children enough dirt, one of them will end up interred:

Even if you give your child’s nose a really good wiping, right before you come in the door, if you give him a couple more minutes, the truth will come out–usually about the time he sneezes:

If you give a child a bit of earth and some water, he’ll give you the world:

If you give a child a smore, well, what did you expect?

If you offer books, all the children who reach the bucket after the kid who claims it as her sailing vessel, will probably read them:

If you point out the existence of hole to a child, he will put his finger in it:

If you give a kid enough freedom, he will create his own universe:

If you can get a kid to hold still for thirty seconds, you will find out just how tired they really are:

If you give a kid a hose, he will spray his brother:

If your kid gives you a hat, wear it with as much dignity as you can muster (especially if she made them, herself):

No matter what you give children, they will find a way to make it into a fort:

And, finally, no matter what you give children, and no matter which way you look at it, they will always have more energy than the adults:


7 responses to “If You Give a Kid A…

  • ladywise

    Sorry it took me a couple of days to comment on this. It was a great post! The snot picture was a little ugggg for me but….well that’s kids for you! lol

  • Freedom Smith

    This is wonderful, Kimber!!! Thank goodness Ladywise pointed me to your correct URL. I had your name but I had gotten the URL wrong. Uggg. I have missed so many of your posts 😦

    Your post is priceless and soooo true. How on earth did you get all of those pictures to go with it. They are fantastic. I think it should be made into a book!!!

    I have missed you, my friend ❗

  • Nena

    Love it! I’m Laughing out loud right now! Oh and really you have to wear the hat? You are my favorite, I love coming to your blog and feeling uplifted… I’m glad I’m back!

    • kimberlybbert

      Yah. You gotta wear the hat. At least for one season. Then it can be absorbed into the great unknown where all the rest of the hats and gloves and boots disappear to every year. Did you ever start blogging again, btw?

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