Boogers, Lost and Found

There was a box of Boogers on my counter this morning. 

Really. 
I have no idea where they came from, but the label promises that all 3.5 tangy ounces were "Picked Out Especially For You!" and  that they "Look and Feel Real!"
I haven't been brave enough to look inside, yet, to verify such a thing. I started to, but just touching the box induced my gag reflex, and so I moved them across the room. 
So far nobody has claimed ownership.

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